Where do I go from here?

The process has began,change  was needed,so where do I go from here?

When I was a little girl I always dreamed that my wedding day would be one that people would never forget. I had it all planned I was going to get married at twenty-five,have my first child at thirty.I was going to be a best selling author,living in a nice quaint community with good schools,and lots of community service events I could participate in.Funny thing is due to a conversation I had with someone,when I was twenty,I didn't want to get married anymore. I mean if you can't be with the one you love....
Anyway I had my babies and focused on raising them then by the time I turned twenty-five I said I will be married by thirty.What's funny is very few people believed me. People who really knew me knew that you can never tell me I can't do something.
I guess my twenty-ninth year must have been the craziest year cause I was engaged twice that year. Although I was thirty when I got married,it wasn't but a month in.
Looking back,I did it cause I wanted to prove a point, instead of just waiting for what God had for me, I went after the right now.
Sad part is I prayed some crazy prayers and none of them came through,lol. I was asking questions I already knew the answers to.
I even fixed my mouth to say "Lord if this is my husband,we will have a baby". I know right. He kept saying to me "It's not my fault you can't get pregnant".
This is where it got kinda funny when you look back at it. I got pregnant twice.
One day I was thinking and I said I guess it happened to prove to him that I could,but I didn't have it cause he was not my husband. Yeah God has an awesome sense of humor!
My dream showed my husband and I raising our child as a unit. He never put in any work around here so I'm sure I would have had to handle everything on my own.

I still have my dreams and aspirations,and I'm sure they will happen sooner than later.I am a firm believer that  it doesn't take forever to know what you want.I know that my one is still out there. And I am convinced that when we cross paths we both will know.
Matter of fact Ima throw this one out in the atmosphere: It is going to happen at the most inopportune moment and we both will know it!

In the meantime I will utilize my own advice and wait. Check out the scenery,enjoy the view and all the little,breathtaking moments that tend to leave me speechless.